Well I am not sure where to start and I apologize in advance if this seems like a big jumbled mess, because basically I am just writing what is in my head without really caring about how it sounds. SO as you can see from my title, I feel like I have finally hit a rock bottom when it comes to weight loss. Sure I have had AHA moments and moments of clarity about WHY I do certain things, like emotional eating, or eating while bored, or even why I join Weight Watchers (which is usually just so I feel like I am actually doing something about my weight, yet never fully follow the program). So I always have these moments of realizing what I do wrong yet I never hit that rock bottom point where I am like "wow this is depressing, I really need to lose weight". I have days where I think I look fine so I just go on eating bad things or not working out, but today I had my actual rock bottom moment.
K was out all day so I thought hey I will go to the mall and do some shopping for Florida and get some shorts or capris and I desperately need a pair of nice dark jeans because right now I have one "fat" pair that are ugly but I have to wear them everyday because thats all that fits me. So I went to the mall, first store the biggest size did not fit, next store I took about 10 items into the fitting room and a guy put me in a room and was talking to me and such. So I went in and was trying on jeans, the largest size in the store I could not pull up barely past my knees. So the guy asked "do you want another size?" and I had to shout "no thanks the biggest size in the store does not fit" UGH. I left the mall empty handed.
As I was walking out of the mall I just thought THIS IS IT. THIS IS MY ROCK BOTTOM. I got to the point where I am too big for the clothes in all the stores I used to shop in and even some other ones that I have tried. All these store stop at size 14 or 16 and I no longer can wear any of them. I felt ostracized, embarrassed, ashamed and guilty and just wanted to cry. I see women who are bigger than me who look beautiful and have clothes that look great on them, where do they shop? Because I have not been able to dress this body successfully. Sometimes I wonder if maybe these women are just bigger women and have been all their lives. Everyone is born with a certain body type and frame. I am originally tall and very lanky and skinny, always have been. So underneath I have these small bones and skinny frame but with a lot of fat placed in certain places, it makes for a very difficult task of finding clothes. I know I am not meant to look like this. This weekend I went home for a big family party and the pictures upset me, and my cousin who is 12 fit into my old prom dress, which I wore at 19 years old. So when I was 19, I was the same size as a 12 year old. This was depressing that only 6 years ago I was that skinny. I mean do not get me wrong I do not want to go back to my very skinny days where I looked like I did not eat (which I did by the way) but I would love to be a size 10, something that I can find at stores and fit into.
This is turning into me rambling, but I am just so done with being overweight. I really am. I know people say "tomorrow is a new day" but honestly if its not, then I will live for years and years like this. It will never change, and I will only get bigger and more depressed over it. I do not want to go to school like this, with zero self confidence. I do not want to go and feel like I am the biggest one on my residence floor or not having clothes to go out in and have fun. I wear crappy jeans and a black t shirt every day because thats all I have that fits and that I am comfortable in.
I have had moments where I thought "I do not want to be like this anymore" but today I had a "I CANNOT BE LIKE THIS ANYMORE"
I just cannot, it is not doing anything but harm to my health, my self esteem, my confidence and my happiness.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
UGH
Well I am mad at myself. I am back up to the weight I started at, 193.
I hope that this feeling of utter shame and guilt really helps me to get on this shit for real.
Sorry for the sullen post, but I am just feeling so bad about it. GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.
What the hell is wrong with me? Why can't I just do it?
I hope that this feeling of utter shame and guilt really helps me to get on this shit for real.
Sorry for the sullen post, but I am just feeling so bad about it. GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.
What the hell is wrong with me? Why can't I just do it?
Friday, July 2, 2010
The Scale is Not Moving...in the right direction
Hello all,
I hope some of you are still following and reading my blog, again I apologize for being such a bad blogger and follower. But I am determined to keep up with the blog. I am getting discouraged. I have been trying weight watchers, trying working out 4 times a week, trying not eating as much, trying pretty much everything I can think of and the scale just does not move. So then after a few weeks of trying these things I think well obviously nothing is going to work so then I just revert back to eating horribly and not working out. Because the weeks that I work out and eat great I do not lose and the weeks that I eat bad and do not work out I stay the same, so sometimes I wonder what is the point then? If anyone has any words of advice I will gladly take them. UGH
On the Harry Potter front, I was a full blown addict. I read all 7 books in the matter of a couple months. I just finished book 7 (the last one) this afternoon, it was both sad and happy in the end. I really loved these books and wish I could just start reading them again. Hopefully in a couple of years I will have forgotten everything and can read them again, but I doubt it because I have such a good memory. But I hope when I am a teacher that I will have a Harry Potter unit and read the books with my class and test them on it and such!
Sorry not much to post today, just kind of feeling down about myself AGAIN. UGH. I hope everyone out there is having a great week.
I hope some of you are still following and reading my blog, again I apologize for being such a bad blogger and follower. But I am determined to keep up with the blog. I am getting discouraged. I have been trying weight watchers, trying working out 4 times a week, trying not eating as much, trying pretty much everything I can think of and the scale just does not move. So then after a few weeks of trying these things I think well obviously nothing is going to work so then I just revert back to eating horribly and not working out. Because the weeks that I work out and eat great I do not lose and the weeks that I eat bad and do not work out I stay the same, so sometimes I wonder what is the point then? If anyone has any words of advice I will gladly take them. UGH
On the Harry Potter front, I was a full blown addict. I read all 7 books in the matter of a couple months. I just finished book 7 (the last one) this afternoon, it was both sad and happy in the end. I really loved these books and wish I could just start reading them again. Hopefully in a couple of years I will have forgotten everything and can read them again, but I doubt it because I have such a good memory. But I hope when I am a teacher that I will have a Harry Potter unit and read the books with my class and test them on it and such!
Sorry not much to post today, just kind of feeling down about myself AGAIN. UGH. I hope everyone out there is having a great week.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
I Have Been A BAD BLOGGER And FOLLOWER!! P.S I Am Not Dead
Well friends, I do not even know where to start!!
I have been a very bad blogger and follower! I am very sorry to all my blog friends that I have been so neglectful and the thing is, I do not even have a good reason (other than full Harry Potter addiction) so I apologize if this blog is incredibly long and crazy all over the place!
Well where shall I begin? There was an earthquake here today!!! And you know what? I did not even feel it. I was in my weight watchers meeting and did not feel a thing yet when I got home everyones Facebook names were about the earthquake and it was all over the news. It was a 5.5 earthquake. K says it woke him up and that the bed was shaking and that the TV was moving and the cats tails were huge and they were freaking out. Isn't that crazy? I did not even feel it!!
Speaking of weight watchers, well...I have not been doing too great. I did not go last week to my meeting so I made sure to go this week even though I was feeling discouraged and beating myself up about eating poorly this past week. But I went anyways and I lost .4 not bad, but I want more! So I intend to track everything this week and my goal is a 1.4 pound loss at my next meeting on Wednesday the 30th! I am just mad at myself because I have been going for 8 weeks and only lost like 3.6 pounds. I want a 5 pound loss sticker darn it, and next week I will get it! I VOW TO IT! SO enough beating myself up about weight loss, I am tracking this week and sticking to program and I WILL get that sticker :) I joined Spark People which I am loving, it is a great way to track your calories and get good ideas so I am enjoying it. My goal I have set on it is to be 162 by Christmas Day which is 1 pound a week from now until then which I thought is realistic. My goal weight is 150-155 but I chose Christmas for my first goal because it will be the first time seeing my family and friends in 4 months since I will be far away at school so I want to look awesome and have them be proud of me! I am really nervous however about losing weight while at school, since that is where I gained it all to begin with HELP!
Speaking of school, there have been a couple of developments. I got into residence (yay) so I am excited about this but nervous. In first year I shared with 4 other girls and we had 2 bathrooms and a kitchen so it was fine, but now I am sharing bathrooms and a kitchen with a whole floor of people, I have never lived in a conventional residence before so I am nervous about this. I am also nervous about K and I living 4 hours apart. We have lived together since about a month into our relationship (crazy eh?) and have been apart for a total of about 10 days our whole relationship so I am really nervous and scared that we might not stay together, that would make me so so sad so I hope it does not happen. Never done the long distance thing before. In other school news we had to pick our schedules and I am scared school looks hard and I have been gone for over a year so I hope I do fine and I am also nervous about teaching, AHHH I AM JUST NERVOUS TO GO PERIOD! I have never been more than 2 hours away from my family and friends and K. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Ok enough yelling about school. One more thing about school...I still do not know what the heck is going on with my loan. I mean I am pretty sure I will get it but I got this letter saying I could not get it for a year and all this CRAP. So I called the office and apparently I got a warning because when I went back for my second degree I got a loan but I decided not to continue with school, however I paid back the entire loan right away. But anyways I hope I get it or else I cannot go to school which would NOT be good. So keep your fingers crossed for me and my loan!
So I am in full Harry Potter obsession mode!!!!!!!! (If you have not read the books and are in the middle of them do not read on as I am saying things about people who die) I am on the 6th book and have about 200 pages left! I was soooooooooooooo sad in the 5th book when Sirius died OMG I was not happy at all he was my favourite. I am sure other people die (DON'T TELL ME) but Sirius made me sad. I want Ron and Hermione to date they clearly love each other, and Harry loves Ginny aww so cute. All I have been doing is reading non stop it is an addiction. I want to know what happens yet I do not know what I will do when the books are done and there aren't anymore to read! I think I might cry! I cannot wait to go to the Harry Potter park in Disney WOOT.
In other news I have started working at another grocery store. It is a lot smaller and the people are nicer. I still do NOT want to work in the grocery bizz anymore but whatever it is for 8 weeks, I can do it. I feel bad only working there for 8 weeks but you gotta do what you gotta do to pay the rent right?
Well this post is getting LONG, I am sure there are things I have not discussed but I promise I will not wait another month to post! Hope you guys are still out there!!
PS DOES ANYONE WATCH THE REAL HOUSEWIVES??
DANIELLE ON NEW JERSEY IS CRAAAAAAAAAAAZY AND LIVES IN HER OWN WORLD
KELLY FROM NEW YORK DRIVES ME CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAZY
AND JILL FROM NEW YORK IS SO HIGH SCHOOL HOW OLD IS SHE?
I LOVE BETHENNEY
HA HA OK THAT IS ALL
I have been a very bad blogger and follower! I am very sorry to all my blog friends that I have been so neglectful and the thing is, I do not even have a good reason (other than full Harry Potter addiction) so I apologize if this blog is incredibly long and crazy all over the place!
Well where shall I begin? There was an earthquake here today!!! And you know what? I did not even feel it. I was in my weight watchers meeting and did not feel a thing yet when I got home everyones Facebook names were about the earthquake and it was all over the news. It was a 5.5 earthquake. K says it woke him up and that the bed was shaking and that the TV was moving and the cats tails were huge and they were freaking out. Isn't that crazy? I did not even feel it!!
Speaking of weight watchers, well...I have not been doing too great. I did not go last week to my meeting so I made sure to go this week even though I was feeling discouraged and beating myself up about eating poorly this past week. But I went anyways and I lost .4 not bad, but I want more! So I intend to track everything this week and my goal is a 1.4 pound loss at my next meeting on Wednesday the 30th! I am just mad at myself because I have been going for 8 weeks and only lost like 3.6 pounds. I want a 5 pound loss sticker darn it, and next week I will get it! I VOW TO IT! SO enough beating myself up about weight loss, I am tracking this week and sticking to program and I WILL get that sticker :) I joined Spark People which I am loving, it is a great way to track your calories and get good ideas so I am enjoying it. My goal I have set on it is to be 162 by Christmas Day which is 1 pound a week from now until then which I thought is realistic. My goal weight is 150-155 but I chose Christmas for my first goal because it will be the first time seeing my family and friends in 4 months since I will be far away at school so I want to look awesome and have them be proud of me! I am really nervous however about losing weight while at school, since that is where I gained it all to begin with HELP!
Speaking of school, there have been a couple of developments. I got into residence (yay) so I am excited about this but nervous. In first year I shared with 4 other girls and we had 2 bathrooms and a kitchen so it was fine, but now I am sharing bathrooms and a kitchen with a whole floor of people, I have never lived in a conventional residence before so I am nervous about this. I am also nervous about K and I living 4 hours apart. We have lived together since about a month into our relationship (crazy eh?) and have been apart for a total of about 10 days our whole relationship so I am really nervous and scared that we might not stay together, that would make me so so sad so I hope it does not happen. Never done the long distance thing before. In other school news we had to pick our schedules and I am scared school looks hard and I have been gone for over a year so I hope I do fine and I am also nervous about teaching, AHHH I AM JUST NERVOUS TO GO PERIOD! I have never been more than 2 hours away from my family and friends and K. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Ok enough yelling about school. One more thing about school...I still do not know what the heck is going on with my loan. I mean I am pretty sure I will get it but I got this letter saying I could not get it for a year and all this CRAP. So I called the office and apparently I got a warning because when I went back for my second degree I got a loan but I decided not to continue with school, however I paid back the entire loan right away. But anyways I hope I get it or else I cannot go to school which would NOT be good. So keep your fingers crossed for me and my loan!
So I am in full Harry Potter obsession mode!!!!!!!! (If you have not read the books and are in the middle of them do not read on as I am saying things about people who die) I am on the 6th book and have about 200 pages left! I was soooooooooooooo sad in the 5th book when Sirius died OMG I was not happy at all he was my favourite. I am sure other people die (DON'T TELL ME) but Sirius made me sad. I want Ron and Hermione to date they clearly love each other, and Harry loves Ginny aww so cute. All I have been doing is reading non stop it is an addiction. I want to know what happens yet I do not know what I will do when the books are done and there aren't anymore to read! I think I might cry! I cannot wait to go to the Harry Potter park in Disney WOOT.
In other news I have started working at another grocery store. It is a lot smaller and the people are nicer. I still do NOT want to work in the grocery bizz anymore but whatever it is for 8 weeks, I can do it. I feel bad only working there for 8 weeks but you gotta do what you gotta do to pay the rent right?
Well this post is getting LONG, I am sure there are things I have not discussed but I promise I will not wait another month to post! Hope you guys are still out there!!
PS DOES ANYONE WATCH THE REAL HOUSEWIVES??
DANIELLE ON NEW JERSEY IS CRAAAAAAAAAAAZY AND LIVES IN HER OWN WORLD
KELLY FROM NEW YORK DRIVES ME CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAZY
AND JILL FROM NEW YORK IS SO HIGH SCHOOL HOW OLD IS SHE?
I LOVE BETHENNEY
HA HA OK THAT IS ALL
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Blog award!
I almost forgot that Stefi over at http://stefis-wl-journey.blogspot.com gave me the Oh My Blog award (thanks girl)! So here are the rules of this award:
1. Get really excited that you got the coolest award ever!
2. Choose one of the following options of accepting the Oh My Blog! award:
(a) Get really drunk and blog for 15 minutes straight, or for as long as you can focus.
(b) Write about your most embarrassing moment.
(c) Write a “soundtrack of your childhood” post.
(d) Make your next blog a ‘vlog’/video blog where you’re basically talking to the camera about whatever.
(e) Take a picture of yourself first thing in the morning, before you do anything else (hair, make up, etc) and post it.
3. Pass the award onto at least three, but preferably more, awesome bloggers and let them know.
So number 1 I am super excited about this award, I am glad that people actually like reading what I write, it makes me happy!! :)
And since I do not drink (not in the last year anyways), nor know how to make a vlog I shall share one of my embarrassing moments with you all, and I have many! This has to do with sex so if you want to stop reading here feel free but it is pretty funny/gross/embarrassing! And K already knows about it so I am free to write it since it is not about him. So I had been dating a guy for about 6 months and we tried sleeping together a few times (lets just say he had a few mechanical issues that were not working) anyways, we finally got to it, and I could feel liquid like dripping all over me, I was thinking ok I guess he just is really sweating it is hot in here. WELL...I went into the bathroom after and had blood all over me!!!!! He had a nosebleed and apparently did not notice. I think this may have been more embarrassing for him but come on, I walked out of his bedroom covered in blood and his roommate was in the living room watching TV. lol. awesome.
My 3 people I nominate this award to are:
Allison over at lovingmycomplicatedlife.blogspot.com/
Whitney over at http://www.slimmingdownforthegown.com
and
Kimmi over at http://fitfatandback.blogspot.com/
enjoy!!
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Getting Real, More Harry and My Best Girls
Hello all,
It has been awhile and yes I have been avoiding, you know me! When I feel like I am not doing that well I hide but I am here to be accountable. I accomplished my goal of working out 4 times this past week, a record for me people I am shocked I did this. However, my eating was not good. I am talking candy, doritos, fritos, ruffles chips and pizza hut. Yes NOT GOOD. I think the boredom and loneliness here has got the better of me, I still do not know one person in this city and I spend most nights alone as K works nights. So I am just looking forward to going to school just to meet some people and then move back home to be closer to friends and family. But I need to learn not to eat my feelings, as my friend Sandra said to me tonight "feeling are not meant to be eaten, I don't think they would taste very good" ha ha she is right, well they do taste good but only momentarily. Today I woke up and did not want to go to my weight watchers meeting as I knew it would be a gain. All that hard work at the gym for nothing. So I skipped my meeting. But as the day went on I thought I cannot just run away from the scale, so I went to the afternoon meeting instead and I lost .2 which is virtually nothing. I just feel like such a failure. I have gone for 6 weeks and only lost 4 pounds, when most people have lost 15 or so in that time. It is because of my eating. So this weeks goal : gym 4 times, track everything and count my points, no chips and no pizza. So lets hope I do it. I want a better loss. I was not getting real with myself and sitting in my ww meeting tonight I knew I was not giving it my all. Well I am going to, I vow to it.
Still loving Harry Potter, I am 100 pages into the 5th book. I have never read a series before and man is it addicting. LOVE IT. I hate Snape, Voldemort, the Malfoys and Percy Weasley and I LOVE Sirius, Ron, Hermione and Hagrid!!!! Such a good story, cannot wait to read more, but will be sad when I am done reading them :(
Not much else to report. I am so lonely here ugh. I miss my best girl friends. I know most people have a group of friends but mine are all spread out. All in different places and all met in different places, some high school, some work, some university so they know of each other but are not friends with each other. Ugh I miss them all soooo much. Two of them are in a different province so I never ever see them but talk to them all the time online, but it is not enough. I want them to move back. I miss the times we used to spend together. And the others live back in my hometown so I am looking forward to being with them more once I move home. This move was a bad experience but it taught me a lot, like who are the most important to me and also that home is where the heart is, and this is not home.
I want to end this post with some pics of me and my 4 best girl friends, I love them and miss them!!
This is Crista, my best friend all through university. We were roomies from day 1 in residence until our last year. I have had sooo many laughs with her and great times and I miss her a lot. She always puts me in my place and tells me like it is and I need that in my life. LOVE HER!
This is Adrienne, we have been friends since we were 3. We were best friends all through middle school and high school. We have had our differences but we are still very close and are always there for each other. We had soo many sleep overs and talks and boy troubles and just everything you can think of, we have dealt with it!! Love her and miss her too!
>
These are 2 of my great friends Meghan and Sandra. Meghan and I were born on the same day in the same hospital and that is where our moms met, so we have been friends since day 1. But the girl in the middle is like my sister from another mother lol. We talk every single day for hours at a time LOVE HER! Def wouldn't have got through many things in life without her.>
This is Alison, we have been friends for about 5 years, love her. We have struggled through boys, university, and just life together. Pop and chip parties forever. This is us New Years right before it turned 2009, a fun night!
PS Is it wrong to admit that I like the Justin Bieber song "Baby"? OK don't answer that lol
PPS CANT FORGET MY BESTIE FOR LIFE
It has been awhile and yes I have been avoiding, you know me! When I feel like I am not doing that well I hide but I am here to be accountable. I accomplished my goal of working out 4 times this past week, a record for me people I am shocked I did this. However, my eating was not good. I am talking candy, doritos, fritos, ruffles chips and pizza hut. Yes NOT GOOD. I think the boredom and loneliness here has got the better of me, I still do not know one person in this city and I spend most nights alone as K works nights. So I am just looking forward to going to school just to meet some people and then move back home to be closer to friends and family. But I need to learn not to eat my feelings, as my friend Sandra said to me tonight "feeling are not meant to be eaten, I don't think they would taste very good" ha ha she is right, well they do taste good but only momentarily. Today I woke up and did not want to go to my weight watchers meeting as I knew it would be a gain. All that hard work at the gym for nothing. So I skipped my meeting. But as the day went on I thought I cannot just run away from the scale, so I went to the afternoon meeting instead and I lost .2 which is virtually nothing. I just feel like such a failure. I have gone for 6 weeks and only lost 4 pounds, when most people have lost 15 or so in that time. It is because of my eating. So this weeks goal : gym 4 times, track everything and count my points, no chips and no pizza. So lets hope I do it. I want a better loss. I was not getting real with myself and sitting in my ww meeting tonight I knew I was not giving it my all. Well I am going to, I vow to it.
Still loving Harry Potter, I am 100 pages into the 5th book. I have never read a series before and man is it addicting. LOVE IT. I hate Snape, Voldemort, the Malfoys and Percy Weasley and I LOVE Sirius, Ron, Hermione and Hagrid!!!! Such a good story, cannot wait to read more, but will be sad when I am done reading them :(
Not much else to report. I am so lonely here ugh. I miss my best girl friends. I know most people have a group of friends but mine are all spread out. All in different places and all met in different places, some high school, some work, some university so they know of each other but are not friends with each other. Ugh I miss them all soooo much. Two of them are in a different province so I never ever see them but talk to them all the time online, but it is not enough. I want them to move back. I miss the times we used to spend together. And the others live back in my hometown so I am looking forward to being with them more once I move home. This move was a bad experience but it taught me a lot, like who are the most important to me and also that home is where the heart is, and this is not home.
I want to end this post with some pics of me and my 4 best girl friends, I love them and miss them!!
This is Crista, my best friend all through university. We were roomies from day 1 in residence until our last year. I have had sooo many laughs with her and great times and I miss her a lot. She always puts me in my place and tells me like it is and I need that in my life. LOVE HER!
This is Adrienne, we have been friends since we were 3. We were best friends all through middle school and high school. We have had our differences but we are still very close and are always there for each other. We had soo many sleep overs and talks and boy troubles and just everything you can think of, we have dealt with it!! Love her and miss her too!
>
These are 2 of my great friends Meghan and Sandra. Meghan and I were born on the same day in the same hospital and that is where our moms met, so we have been friends since day 1. But the girl in the middle is like my sister from another mother lol. We talk every single day for hours at a time LOVE HER! Def wouldn't have got through many things in life without her.>
This is Alison, we have been friends for about 5 years, love her. We have struggled through boys, university, and just life together. Pop and chip parties forever. This is us New Years right before it turned 2009, a fun night!
PS Is it wrong to admit that I like the Justin Bieber song "Baby"? OK don't answer that lol
PPS CANT FORGET MY BESTIE FOR LIFE
Thursday, May 27, 2010
70 Followers, Biggest Loser and Harry Potter
Hello all
I know my title is a bit jumbled but hey these are the things I want to talk about along with a few other things so why not just throw it all in there!? I hope everyone is having a good week so far, mine has not been too bad I weighed in at Weight Watchers on Tuesday morning and was down .8 which I was happy about but I am ready for bigger numbers and I know I can get them. I have been going for a month and have only lost 3.8 so I want to rev up the weight loss. This week I want a 2 pound loss, I know this is a lot to ask for but I think I can do it. If I lose anything at all I will be out of the 190s yay, my at home scale says I have been out of the 190s for a couple weeks but at WW I am fully clothed so I weigh more so I am excited to be fully clothed and in the 180s woot.
This week i challenged myself to go to the gym 4 times in one week so between Tuesday the 25th and Tuesday the 1st of June (JUNE can you believe it??). So I am proud to say I have gone once so far and am going today with K so that will make 2, so who knows people I may even go FIVE times instead of four. That would be awesome. I really believe I can lose weight and go to the gym consistently which I never have before. I was having a hard time going to the gym here in this city because it was right downtown and soooo busy, and I am sure there are a couple of you who know what I mean by being scared or intimidated to go to such a busy gym. So there is another branch of the Y in the city but in a more rural area so I thought why not try it? I will never go back to the downtown one. I was 1 of about 5 people in the whole place. I am sure it is not always that dead but if I keep going during the day I bet it will be. YAY. I felt so comfortable there and was not scared or intimidated and all the machines I wanted were available and I even had my own lane at the pool so I did not have to worry about being in the same lane as a really fast swimmer. So I think I will continue to go to this gym and maybe even get the gym fever lol, here's hoping.
I cannot believe I have 70 followers!! I was so excited when I saw this I could not believe it, so just a shout out to my followers, you guys are awesome and I really appreciate everything you guys have said and all the advice and motivation you have given me!! SO THANKS :)
So onto the Biggest Loser finale, wow every finale just seems to get better I mean how do these people do it? They look fabulous. Melissa of the red team looked awesome and I was so scared she was going to win the 100 000 thank goodness she didn't. When she said "it is not about the money for us" I shouted YOU LIAR at the TV lol that is probably the only reason she did so well. She even pissed me off when she was on the scale. UGH to her. UGH. Anyways I was really happy with the final 3, I am not a Koli fan he just seemed to care too much about winning and did not seem happy at all the whole night. They all looked really great and I am happy for all of them. Ashley and Michael looked AMAZING! I am so happy for both of them and the thing I liked is that a lot of times the finalists just look too ripped and they look a little unnatural (Helen) and a lot of them gain some weight back so I thought Ashley and Michael just looked really healthy and great. Daris looked good too but I was kind of disappointed a bit by something with his story. He had never had a girlfriend or never been kissed before and now all of a sudden that he is skinny he has a girlfriend. That just saddens me, I mean I am sure that a lot of it is because now he has confidence and such but I am sure that he got rejected a lot purely due to the fact that he was overweight and now that he is not he has a girlfriend. I don't know that kind of hurt me a bit makes me sad for people who have great personalities and are great people but get overlooked. In the end I was happy for Michael and hope that him and Ashley get married ha ha wouldn't they make a great couple?
Onto student loans, I found out that my old university had dropped the ball and not documented that I had re-payed an overpayment back in 2009, so I made some calls and got that taken care of so now the OSAP website says "application being processed and OSAP is contacting outside parties to make sure everything on your application is valid check back in 2 or 3 days" lets all pray that it works out so I can go to school.
OK so now onto my addiction, HARRY POTTER!!!!!!! I tried for years to avoid reading these books, I just did not think I would be into them. My mom bought me the first one years and years ago when it came out, I read about 10 pages and decided I wasn't into it. Then I started a new venture trying to read the 100 best books of all time and on there of course were the 7 Potter books. So I thought fine I will get them over with. I started the first one about 2 months ago and have been hooked every since. They are just soooooooooooooo good! I just started the 4th one a couple days ago and just want to know everything NOW! I cannot wait to go to Disney this summer and see the Harry Potter park in Universal Studios YAY. So do any of my blog followers read Harry Potter? What was your favourite book out of the 7? Who are your favourite characters? BUT DO NOT GIVE ANYTHING AWAY I AM ONLY ON THE BEGINNING OF BOOK 4 SO NO SPOILERS PLEASE!!
Have a good Thursday all!
I know my title is a bit jumbled but hey these are the things I want to talk about along with a few other things so why not just throw it all in there!? I hope everyone is having a good week so far, mine has not been too bad I weighed in at Weight Watchers on Tuesday morning and was down .8 which I was happy about but I am ready for bigger numbers and I know I can get them. I have been going for a month and have only lost 3.8 so I want to rev up the weight loss. This week I want a 2 pound loss, I know this is a lot to ask for but I think I can do it. If I lose anything at all I will be out of the 190s yay, my at home scale says I have been out of the 190s for a couple weeks but at WW I am fully clothed so I weigh more so I am excited to be fully clothed and in the 180s woot.
This week i challenged myself to go to the gym 4 times in one week so between Tuesday the 25th and Tuesday the 1st of June (JUNE can you believe it??). So I am proud to say I have gone once so far and am going today with K so that will make 2, so who knows people I may even go FIVE times instead of four. That would be awesome. I really believe I can lose weight and go to the gym consistently which I never have before. I was having a hard time going to the gym here in this city because it was right downtown and soooo busy, and I am sure there are a couple of you who know what I mean by being scared or intimidated to go to such a busy gym. So there is another branch of the Y in the city but in a more rural area so I thought why not try it? I will never go back to the downtown one. I was 1 of about 5 people in the whole place. I am sure it is not always that dead but if I keep going during the day I bet it will be. YAY. I felt so comfortable there and was not scared or intimidated and all the machines I wanted were available and I even had my own lane at the pool so I did not have to worry about being in the same lane as a really fast swimmer. So I think I will continue to go to this gym and maybe even get the gym fever lol, here's hoping.
I cannot believe I have 70 followers!! I was so excited when I saw this I could not believe it, so just a shout out to my followers, you guys are awesome and I really appreciate everything you guys have said and all the advice and motivation you have given me!! SO THANKS :)
So onto the Biggest Loser finale, wow every finale just seems to get better I mean how do these people do it? They look fabulous. Melissa of the red team looked awesome and I was so scared she was going to win the 100 000 thank goodness she didn't. When she said "it is not about the money for us" I shouted YOU LIAR at the TV lol that is probably the only reason she did so well. She even pissed me off when she was on the scale. UGH to her. UGH. Anyways I was really happy with the final 3, I am not a Koli fan he just seemed to care too much about winning and did not seem happy at all the whole night. They all looked really great and I am happy for all of them. Ashley and Michael looked AMAZING! I am so happy for both of them and the thing I liked is that a lot of times the finalists just look too ripped and they look a little unnatural (Helen) and a lot of them gain some weight back so I thought Ashley and Michael just looked really healthy and great. Daris looked good too but I was kind of disappointed a bit by something with his story. He had never had a girlfriend or never been kissed before and now all of a sudden that he is skinny he has a girlfriend. That just saddens me, I mean I am sure that a lot of it is because now he has confidence and such but I am sure that he got rejected a lot purely due to the fact that he was overweight and now that he is not he has a girlfriend. I don't know that kind of hurt me a bit makes me sad for people who have great personalities and are great people but get overlooked. In the end I was happy for Michael and hope that him and Ashley get married ha ha wouldn't they make a great couple?
Onto student loans, I found out that my old university had dropped the ball and not documented that I had re-payed an overpayment back in 2009, so I made some calls and got that taken care of so now the OSAP website says "application being processed and OSAP is contacting outside parties to make sure everything on your application is valid check back in 2 or 3 days" lets all pray that it works out so I can go to school.
OK so now onto my addiction, HARRY POTTER!!!!!!! I tried for years to avoid reading these books, I just did not think I would be into them. My mom bought me the first one years and years ago when it came out, I read about 10 pages and decided I wasn't into it. Then I started a new venture trying to read the 100 best books of all time and on there of course were the 7 Potter books. So I thought fine I will get them over with. I started the first one about 2 months ago and have been hooked every since. They are just soooooooooooooo good! I just started the 4th one a couple days ago and just want to know everything NOW! I cannot wait to go to Disney this summer and see the Harry Potter park in Universal Studios YAY. So do any of my blog followers read Harry Potter? What was your favourite book out of the 7? Who are your favourite characters? BUT DO NOT GIVE ANYTHING AWAY I AM ONLY ON THE BEGINNING OF BOOK 4 SO NO SPOILERS PLEASE!!
Have a good Thursday all!
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